One morning I decided

One morning, I read a chapter from a book, titled Wild Words by Nicole Gulotta. It highlighted the importance of connecting and building trust with your readers. It sounded inspiring. So, a few minutes later, I was choosing a template for the blog and designing the website

for the rest of the day. 

You see, I’m impulsive like that. I get an idea and I want it to happen instantly. When it inevitably doesn’t, I get overwhelmed and stressed, trying to somehow get my idea through. However, by the end of the day, I realised

what a terrible idea this was. What was I thinking? I can’t publish a blog. It’s too stressful. 

The idea and demands of starting a blog had at last started to sink in. The consistency, frequency, and writing required and expected to have a blog, was too much for me. Just the idea was overwhelming me by the end of the day. I wanted to delete and forget it. Start a fresh day tomorrow, going back to my familiar routines. 

But, ugh, I wanted this to work. A part of me thought, There must be a solution. Hopefully not, the other part was dreaming. 

Then I remembered what I had written that morning on the home page of the blog:

“With a delicate and sensitive soul, I thrive on setting my own pace in life. On this blog, you can be yourself, with your beautiful mind and unique needs.”

Only a few hours after writing that and I had already forgotten I do not thrive unless I do it in my own pace. 

How easy it is to compare with what other people are doing. Loading unreasonable expectations and pressure on myself. 

Oh, how easy it is to brush aside my needs in order to do what everyone else seems to be doing and telling me to do. 

Amidst the evening I realised and accepted: I struggle with commitments, deadlines, schedules. But I love to read and write poetry. Which is the reason I wanted to start this blog. 

So, rather than designating days regarding when to post, write, and connect, I recognised I needed to discard that, and instead find my own rhythm and manageable pace that would allow me to have a blog without damaging and neglecting my needs. 

As a result, I can now say

Welcome! To Matilda’s poetry. A blog inspired to be a place for sensitive souls who thrive in their own pace and ways. This blog needs and welcomes you to be yourself. You are loved and we need you here. 

Writing Exercise: What does your own unique pace feel like? How does it taste, feel, sound, smell, and look like? Explore your response in whatever type and form of writing you want. 

Reflection: In what ways have you adopted a more rigorous pace than your soul and mind can handle? Ponder gentle ways that you can incorporate into your daily life in order to start breathing to the beat of your own heart. 

Gentle writing, 

Matilda

Reference:

Gulotta, Nicole. (2019). “Wild Words: Rituals, Routines, and Rhythms for Braving the Writer’s Path.” Roost Books.